I am approaching the end of the road in which God must show up... or... does He?

Maybe what I have been considering He must do is what He must not do.

Background:

Resources have ran out. I have used the little strength that I have and what was left in my hand to respond to the call of God on my life.

All is running out and to see forward movement requires tangible resources to keep me afloat, like, now.

This has a sobering and sombering impact on my being.

The interesting part about this is, what if God doesn't show up? 

What if he doesn't provide the financial resources I need?

What if every aspect of my life is annihilated?

Is that maybe the point?

To know there is life beyond complete destruction of everything you thought you needed.

Maybe "they" will take all. Maybe everything will get shut down and cancelled. Maybe I'll end up in jail.

I will still have breath wont I? I will still have life. I will still have two children. I will still have Jesus. 

I will still have all that I want and all that I need and maybe that is the lesson to be learned here.

To let go and let it all fall away and to see whats left, starting anew from that place.

I feel as though BIG is coming. I know Im on the cusp of it.

At the same time my resources have dwindled and things are past, past due.

Also, God is calling me to cast my net on the other side and try again. My response...with what?

God's response: With the little stregnth that you have and the little bit of what's left in your hand.

But what is that, I ask.

God.

Go with God.

So now I am just moving with God, day to day, as He instructs, as He leads.

I dont understand all of what is taking place in the spiritual or in the natural at this point in my life.

I don't know how much more loss one can endure or how much lower one can go or how much spiritual warfare one can take or how much testing and trials one can endure after having gone through so much for so long.

But I do know God does.

His desire is clear- keep going. If God is telling me to keep going than I know that I can. I also know now that I must.

Whether I lose it all in this moment or gain it all in this moment, my contentment is in the fact that I truly do have all that I need in my being, in my children, in Christ.

This is His life that I have given to Him and if this is how He wants His life lived, so be it. This is His plan, His will, His desires.

So, I have made my prayers time and time again and now I cast them to you Jesus and I trust you with them.

Today, I live knowing that I have all that I need for today and for my life.

I will continue to work with what I have in what you have called me to do until I can work no more.

With my only goal being to hear one day, "Job well done. Good and faithful servant."

From Jesus:

Wait on the promise Jennifer. It's coming. Don't give up on it. it is within reach. Just keep going and soon you will find yourself in the midst of it.